Lessons from 30!

Today I enter a new decade!  Leading up to today I've been thinking about the many things I've learned up to this point and all the things I'd like to do better in this coming year.  Here are a list of my top ten:

1. Just ask.  When I was younger I'd rather walk out of a store without something than have to ask for help.  Now?  Who has time for that?  I'm the person who you'll likely find talking to the greeter before I even look for something myself!  Don't be afraid to ask for help or clarification.  It saves time and, often enough, saves anxiety as well!

2. Worry less about what others think.  This is an area I've improved on a lot, but hope to continue growing in.  I have spent too much time putting effort into things that don't matter to me in order to "impress" someone else.  Why?  If it's not something I'm passionate about or care about, why waste time on that when I can do something that make my heart light up?!

3. Wear it.  You know the thing.  That outfit just popped into your mind, the one you want to wear, but worry what others will think.  Maybe it's something super fancy or perhaps it's your most comfy pair of sweat pants.  Go for it!  Not sure?  See number 2.

4. Find ways to love your everyday!  Don't wait for vacation or that special trip to enjoy yourself!  Find some special little things to brighten your days.  Maybe it's baking a cake with your kids just because, taking a walk, sitting in silence with a perfect cup of coffee, jumping through the hose in your yard, whatever it is, take the time and DO IT! 

5. Take a moment each day to be grateful. I recently heard someone speak on how gratitude is the fastest way to happiness.  Take a moment each day to consider what you are thankful for.  Write it down, tell somebody, but make sure you recognize life's little blessings.

6.  Accept the change of plans with grace.  This is still an area I need major improvements in.  Life, especially life with kids, can change course very quickly and without warning.  Try not to waste time being upset or frustrated by those changes.  Instead embrace them with grace and move forward.

7. Find what you love and do it!  Discover that thing that makes you smile, gives you life, fuels your fire, and then make time to do it. 

8. Get a smaller planner!  Haha!  This may be specific to me or other Type A's out there, but seriously, get the smaller planner.  Don't schedule a week's worth of chores in one day and be upset when you can't finish it.  You don't, in fact, have super powers!  Try schedule ONE thing to do each day that must get done and then leave it at that. 

9. Find community.  This life is not meant to be lived alone.  Find your people.

10. Take care of yourself - mind, body, and soul.  Ok, here's the major one.  Practice good self-care.  Take time daily to be with God.  He will renew your spirit, give you peace, and guide your days.  And take steps to care for your body.  Don't get me wrong, still eat that cake and love it, but maybe in moderation.  ;)

So there it is.  My top 10 thoughts as I enter this new decade.  There are many more that come to mind as I consider all the areas I feel I've grown in the past several years, but these are my favorites!  :)

Encourage One Another

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. - 1 Thessalonians 5:11

Over the past couple of weeks I have seen so many posts, articles, comments, etc. of moms very aggressively sharing their views on mothering.  While sharing these opinions in and of themselves is not wrong, the manner in which I have seen it is. I read verses like the one above and weep a little.  We are called to encourage one another and build each other up . . . but is that "just as in fact [we] are doing?"  When I read a post, especially one between Christian mothers, that leaves my stomach turning, not because of the advice or opinions, but because of the tone, words, and anger behind them, it hurts my heart.  I'm not the first to say all of this and I'm sure I won't be the last.  Being a mom is hard work!  We have so much to decide on - sleeping, eating, playtime, outdoor playing, screen time, music, education, even diapers for goodness sakes!  And each one of us will make those decisions.  We'll have opinions of why our choice is best and maybe are so convinced at how great our decision was that we want to share it with others.  No matter what decision we make, one thing is the same.  We want the best for our child.  We want them to feel loved, to succeed, to know the Lord, to see His work in our lives, to be healthy, to be encouraged . . . and the list goes on.

I don't know the perfect answer to all of these decisions for every mama in the world, but what I do know is this.  God gave me my son.  And He gave me to him.  I know him better than any other person on this planet.  I know my family better than any other person on this planet.  And God trusted me with them.  He gave me the ability to think and make decisions.  He taught me to trust Him and turn to Him when those decisions are hard.  He taught me to listen to Him and stand firm in obedience even when it didn't make sense to others (or even myself).  How God has led me to raise my children may not be the same as He led you, but know that it doesn't change my opinion of you and it will not change my support of you.  

Being a mama is hard, but you are doing a great job!  How do I know?  Because if you are following the Lord and calling on Him to help raise your child, you are making the best decisions (even the hard ones) and are leaning on the best Father there ever was or will be to give you wisdom.  He knows you and your child intimately, after all He formed your child in your womb (Psalm 139)!  He has plans for you and your child and His plans are good and are never thwarted (Jeremiah 29:11, Job 42:2).

My purpose in this post is to encourage mamas to remember how hard it is and rather than make those decisions harder for other mamas, encourage them.  Offer advice if it's asked for, but encourage whatever decision they make.  If you think they've made the wrong decision, pray that the Lord would lead them to a different decision, but ultimately trust that God will lead them in what is best for their child.  

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. - Hebrews 10:24-25

My Heart Breaks

I sit down to watch the news to find a special on the Syrian refugee crisis.  As I watch them pan the camera around a huge room full of cots I spot an infant climbing on one of the beds and suddenly I'm transported there.  This is my child, my reality.  Just a few months ago things got so bad I had to grab a backpack and decide which items in my home were of most importance.  What would give us a higher chance of survival?  I pack up items for my infant child and figure out how to carry all of this and leave my home.  I don't know exactly where I'm going, but all I know is anywhere is safer than here.  I pray we will find food before what we have runs out.  I hope there will be a place where we can find water along the way and maybe even a place to get out of the elements.  All I know is anywhere is safer than here.  I walk and walk for hundreds of miles carry the single bag we could hold and try to comfort my son only to find myself denied access to go any farther or get any help.  Or perhaps I do make it into a refugee camp and find myself gated into a room where I have generously been given a cot, some food, and water, but what kind of life is this for my child?  At least he's alive and, for the moment, safe, but where do we go from here?  Is this our life?  Relegated to a room full of cots?  And just like that I'm back in my living room sitting on my couch watching the news and weeping.  My son is safe and I am sitting well fed and hydrated with a roof over my head, but what of that woman's child?  What of her life?  What of her husband who looks at his family and cries inside wishing he could provide more for them?  I pray earnestly for them and can't even express the physical weight I feel at the thought of what those families are facing.

With all of this heartache I turn on social media only to find so many people saying such hateful things and expressing a desire to deny these people any peace, protection, or future.  And, yet again, my heart breaks.  This time not for the physical needs of people, but for spiritual needs.  Many of those I see fighting to keep these refugees away are Christians.  I read them and think, Have they forgotten?  What does God's Word say?  Has He ever commanded us to ignore those in need?  Quite the opposite!  Verse after verse, word after word commands us to love, show compassion, offer food, give shelter.  We are even told to pray for our enemies!  So how can we justify such hateful responses while still claiming to follow Christ's example?  (You do know Christian means "little Christ," right?)

The justification of many is they fear a terrorist will slip in through the cracks and harm us.  I understand that fear, but can I be blatantly honest with you?  If that is your thinking, the terrorists and our ultimate Enemy have already won.  You have allowed them to persuade you to turn your back on those in need (and God's Word) to fulfill the fleshly desire to protect your own at any cost.  Is it wrong to want your family safe?  Absolutely not!  But if your actions go against the Word of God, in my humble opinion, you are wrong.  Understand that everything I say I put myself in that position and wonder, could I do it?  Would I want a refugee family staying in my home?  How would I feel?  Perhaps it is the Lord's grace for me in this situation, but I would gladly take a family in, knowing this is what God calls me to do - provide shelter, food, water, protection, and love.  Would it be challenging?  Yes.  But I have chosen to trust that whatever the Lord calls me to do He has purpose for.  And He will give me the strength, provision, and protection needed to carry out His Will in my life and in my family's life.  I can only do this by placing my faith in Him alone, not on earthly securities, military power, or my own abilities. 

I typically stay away from controversial topics, but this particular one has broken my heart, both for the Syrian refugees and the state of Christianity in America.  I apologize if I stepped on any toes, but I felt it needed to be said.  And if you are offended, I encourage you to go to Scripture and let me know if I have said anything that does not align with God's Word. 

Finally, I want to encourage you to read a wonderful article put out by Relevant Magazine entitled "What the Bible says About How to Treat Refugees."  The article is simply a list of verses with a one sentence header for each summarizing what action that verse calls us to take.  You can find the article here.

No Fear in Love

"And so we know and rely on the love God has for us . . . There is no fear in love." 

- 1 John 4:16a, 18a

When we fear punishment or isolation from God for our misdeeds, it is because we do not understand His everlasting love.  Unfortunately this misdeed-punishment scenario might fit examples of "love" you have seen or experienced on earth, but this is fallen, imperfect "love."  Our Enemy has done a great job of teaching us to project onto God what we see in society, but this is flawed.  God's ways and thoughts are higher than our own (Isaiah 55:8-9).  So too is His love.  His love is perfect, pure, everlasting . . . and UNconditional.  He loves you.  That will never change, adjust, alter.  It is constant just as He is constant - He never changes.  He is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8).  Stop condemning yourself, thinking God is upset or angry with you.  Instead, ask Him to show you His love for you and pray for Him to help you receive the fullness of His love.

What If It Were Me?

Remember those who are in prison, as though you were in prison with them; those who are being tortured, as though you yourselves were being tortured. - Hebrews 13:3

As I read this passage I was deeply convicted.  How many times have I heard of horrific situations people are facing, maybe even pray for them in the moment, and then a few minutes later I've continued on with my life and completely forgotten what they're going through.  This verse reminds me to remember the plights and prayers of people as if I myself were facing the situation.  I wouldn't forget to lift up a prayer for provision if I were facing financial ruin, to seek supernatural healing and peace while encountering a troubling diagnosis, or ask God to move mightily if I were lost in a state of depression, yet I so often forget to lift up similar requests for those around me who are facing these situations.  The only response I can find is to repent for my lack of focus and concern for others and ask God to open my heart and eyes to these situations around me with a renewed understanding and motivation to lift them up in prayer and support them as the Lord leads.


Lord, forgive my negligence. Give me a heart that is open and willing to be affected and broken by the plights of others.  Teach me not to be afraid to become invested that I might better serve my neighbors for Your Glory.  Amen.

The God I Serve

Lord, You are the King eternal.
When I speak of my help,
it is You I can count on.

It is You who comes to my rescue,
who shakes the heavens,
who sends light in my darkest night.
You are the King eternal.

Father, You are my compassionate protector.
You move mountains to come to my aid,
it is You I cry out to.
It is You who never leaves me,
who never condemns me,
who is always full of love towards me.
You are my compassionate protector.

Jesus, You are the lover of my soul.
You stand with me in joy and sorrow,
it is You I pour my heart out to.
It is You who understands my pain,
who rejoices with me in good times,
who cries with me and comforts me at night.
You are the lover of my soul.

Dating God

Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. – Psalm 90:14

Have you ever seen a couple in love?  You know the ones I'm talking about.  The ones that are constantly together or when they're not together wish they were?  The ones who are always talking about their significant other?  Sharing about what they did recently or generally how wonderful they are?  These people desire to speak to that love first thing in the morning, they want to spend time with them, talk to them, pour over letters from them, and generally be consumed by that love.

I was watching a sunset over the beach recently when God reminded me that this is how my relationship with Him should look.  He began calling me back to my first love.  Reminding me how much He loves me and how much He desires to speak with me and have a relationship with me.

“Therefore I am now going to allure her;
   I will lead her into the wilderness
   and speak tenderly to her." – Hosea 2:14

Your God loves you with an unfailing love.  He created every part of you – your appearance, your personality, your talents, your passions and desires – and He loves every bit of it!  It's almost hard to believe since, for many of us, there are things about ourselves that we don't like.  We couldn't imagine how anyone could love that quirk, but it's true.  God is crazy about you!  Even that aspect of yourself that you find annoying, He smiles just thinking about it!

Let the king be enthralled by your beauty;
   honor him, for he is your lord. – Psalm 45:11

As I sat on the beach and began thinking of all the couples I know in love, I began to get a picture of how my relationship with God should be when I realize how much He loves me and how much I love Him in return.  When I begin to understand this love, each morning is approached with eager expectation to talk to Him.  It is a thrill to spend any and all time I have in His Presence.  And it's an absolute joy to pour over His Word as it becomes a love letter written just for me!  It's this whole idea of dating God.  He desires an intimate relationship with you.  The kind of relationship where you enjoy being in His Presence, where no conversation is off limits, and where joy overflows. 

I encourage you to consider dating God.  Take some time to spend just with Him.  Get to know each other.  Go on a "date" with God!  (He took me to the beach to watch a beautiful sunset that I believe He created just for me! J)  Read His Word and begin to understand how He feels about you.  Talk to Him – tell Him everything, He wants to know.  In essence, simply learn to love God.  As you draw to closer to Him, He will draw closer to you.  And just like that couple in love, you'll find yourself waking up ready to talk, telling anyone near you how wonderful He is, and desiring to simply spend time in His Presence.

“In that day,” declares the LORD,
   “you will call me ‘my husband’;
   you will no longer call me ‘my master."^' – Hosea 2:16

Where's the joy?

What has happened to all your joy? - Galatians 4:15a

A few weeks ago I returned from an incredible, life-changing trip to Ghana, West Africa.  While there I saw many things I had never seen before:  orphan children, people sleeping on streets without even a cardboard box to soften the concrete, malnourished children and adults . . . and pure, unadulterated joy.

Everything else I had prepared for, but not the joy.  As I sat and played with children who were orphaned, dirty, were wearing torn cloths, and a giant smile on their face I was astonished.  Part of me asked Do they know how bad their situation is?  Do they realize how little they have?  Watching this I couldn't help but consider how many American children live.  They have TVs, video games, movies, toys, iPods, every latest gadget, and yet most are miserable.

I began to realize these children had the "secret."  They had learned what Paul taught:

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.- Philippians 4:12-13

While there I was incredibly convicted of how much stuff I have, but that I lack something crucial - joy.  Praise God that He is the Provider of joy:

You became imitators of us and of the Lord, for you welcomed the message in the midst of severe suffering with the joy given by the Holy Spirit.  1 Thessalonians 1:6


Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy. - 1 Peter 1:8 

We are filled with an inexpressible joy when we believe in God and come to know Him more.  As we read about and experience His never-ending, all-consuming love for us we stand in awe and are filled with joy over our God who loves us and sent His Son to die that we might be saved!

This is my sincere prayer for you - that God would open your eyes to the magnitude of His love for you.  That you would begin to see that this love will never change, whether you have much or have little.  May God fill you with the inexpressible joy that can only come from Him.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.- Romans 15:13

The Annoying Kid Next Door

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! – 1 John 3:1a          

    
       As I wrote my last post on service and was thinking about God's mercy and the Church's response to Him I found myself sad on the Lord's behalf.  In my own experience I can remember how I've treated God at times, how I've pushed Him out of the way to make room for other things, how I've forgotten Him. 

    
        I think sometimes we forget what it means to have relationship with Christ.  We forget who He is in our lives.  Consider this:  you're at a big, fancy event and see this person that you really admire.  They're rich, world famous, powerful, influential.  You see them surrounded by a huge crowd and although you wish you could say hello you know there's no way you would get close enough to say anything, and even if you did, would they even notice you?  As you're standing in the corner contemplating this, that person sees you from a distance, calls out your name, and runs towards you!  They give you a giant hug, tell you how they've been waiting to meet you, and ask if you have any time coming up that you could hang out.  How do you respond?  Most of us would clear our calendars for as long as we could to hang out with that person!  I mean if this famous person wants to hang out with us, what could possibly get in the way of that, right?

     
       Now, imagine that person is Christ.  How do you respond?  It's sad to say many of us would respond completely different.  We'd pull out our calendars, hum and hull about some appointment we have, and end up asking if they could e-mail us later to find a date.  It's sad, but we think of Jesus more as the annoying kid next door that our mom makes us play with than this awesome, amazing God of the universe who desires to spend time with us. We spend time with Him because we feel like we're supposed to - after all, isn't it the "Christian thing to do?"   We pray and read our Bibles because we don't want to hurt God's feelings or because "mom said."  In truth, if you simply looked at the fact that we are but a vapor on this earth and He is the everlasting God, we should be so honored and amazed that He should want relationship with us, that He should even know our name, that we would clear our calendars for the rest of our lives to make room for whatever He wants to do!

        
    Are you treating Him as the amazing, merciful, and compassionate God that He is or has He become that annoying kid next door in your life?

Whoever has My commands and keeps them is the one who loves Me. The one who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them.” – John 14:21

(Beautiful picture courtesy of my friend, Jessica Sepúlveda.  Thanks, Jess!)

Service is a Choice

Then [Jesus] called the crowd to Him along with His disciples and said: “Whoever wants to be My disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow Me." – Mark 8:34

          
     The other day I was contemplating the idea of living in service to God.  I was thinking how God sent His Son, Jesus, to take my punishment before I ever asked to be saved.  Part of me began to think, "I never asked for Him to do that so why should I dedicate my life to Him?  He did that all on His own.  I'm grateful and accept the sacrifice He made for me, but do I have to give up how I want to live my life for Him?"  The resounding answer in my head was simple – no.  I don't have to give my life in service to my God.  He loved me so much that He gave me free will so that I could make my own decisions.  In the case of service to the Lord who gave His life for mine, I again find that I have the free will to decide how I will respond to His amazing gift of love.

            
     An excellent example of this concept can be found in the fairly recent movie "The Conte of Monte Cristo." About halfway through the movie we find our main character, Edmond Dantes, washed up on a beach after escaping a prison where he was wrongly incarcerated, beaten, and held without hope of release.  Unfortunately, he finds himself in the midst of a rough-looking band of pirates.  The captain, instead of killing him outright, orders him to fight one of his crew to the death and the winner would be allowed to live.  This crew member, Jacopo, wronged the captain and was destined to be killed anyways.  As the fight ensues Dantes comes to the point where he could kill Jacopo.  Instead, however, he chooses to spare Jacopo's life and even pleads on his behalf to the captain, thus sparing his own life and Jacopo's.  Amazed at Dante's willingness to spare him, Jacopo devotes his life in service to Dantes.

    
        What an awesome portrayal of our own relationship with Christ!  Christ was wrongly accused, beaten, and killed yet when He could kill us for our sins, He chose instead to show mercy.  What surprises me most about this scene is Jacopo's response.  He was an immoral pirate, a thief, yet he gives his life in service to Dantes after being saved.  He could have very easily said, "Thanks, man!  Catch you around sometime!"  Instead, he recognized the sacrifice that was made and desired to serve in response. 

      
      He faced the same choice we face with regard to service of Christ.  We could look at His sacrifice, accept it, and say, "Hey Jesus, that was really nice of you.  Maybe I'll see you later sometime" or we could choose to say, "Jesus, I am so undeserving of the sacrifice you made for me.  I give my life for you to use as You would see fit.  Let me be of service to You.  Use me, Father."

      
      Am I forced to serve God with my life?  No.  Is it my honor and privilege to allow God to use me for His purposes?  Most definitely.  That is the choice I made, but you get to make this choice for yourself.  No one can force you one way or the other.  Service is a choice.

Therefore I glory in Christ Jesus in my service to God. – Romans 15:17

What Love!

But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8

On nice days I enjoy taking walks on the beach near my house.  This afternoon was such a day.  As I walked along the beach looking at shells I saw what seemed to be a pretty white shell, but it was upside down.  Reaching over to pick it up I found that there was dirt and grime stuck to its beautiful front.  Instead of putting it in my pocket with the rest of my treasures, I laid it back down on the sand.  As I stood and continued walking, God revealed something wonderful to me.  In His eyes, no shell is too dirty!  No shell is turned away!

While I was looking for near perfection, Jesus found beauty in the dirty, grimy shell!

For the Son of Man came to seek and to save that which was lost.  – Luke 19:10

It still amazes me that while I was still lost in my sin, still a child of darkness, Christ took my punishment on the cross.  I had never heard His Name, had never made a decision to follow Him or to even accept His precious gift, but He loved me so much even then that He died for me anyways!  What love!  What love that He could love me even in my lost, broken, sinful state!

 “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;  I have summoned you by name; you are Mine . . . Since you are precious and honored in My sight, and because I love you, I will give people in exchange for you, nations in exchange for your life." -  Isaiah 43:1b, 4

 As I was walking home from the beach, in awe of this love God has shown me, a beautiful song came on my iPod.  The lyrics of this song talk about how sometimes we wish we could take back all those things we did before Christ.  That somehow God would erase that person we were before.  As the song continues, however, it has a beautiful message that the remembrance of where we've been keeps us in awe of the One who brought us out of the bondage of our past of sin into a future of freedom with the God who loves us dearly!

I used to wish that I could rewrite history.  I used to dream that each mistake could be erased.  Then I could just pretend I never knew the me back then. 

I used to pray that You would take this shame away.  Hide all the evidence of who I’ve been.
But it’s the memory of the place You brought me from that keeps me on my knees and even though I’m free . . .

Heal the wound but leave the scar.  A reminder of how merciful You are . . .

I have not lived a life that boasts of anything I don’t take pride in what I bring.  But I’ll build an altar with the rubble that You’ve found me in and every stone will sing of what You can redeem . . .

Don’t let me forget everything You’ve done for me.  Don’t let me forget the beauty in the suffering.

Heal the wound but leave the scar, a reminder of how merciful You are . . . 

~ "Heal the Wound" By:  Point of Grace

I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions, for My own sake, and remembers your sins no more.  - Isaiah 43:25