On The Hard Days

A couple months back we were having one of those mornings.  You know the one.  Where by 9am as we piled into the car, children had already gotten in trouble, clothes changed, tears (kids and me), and I was at my wits end.  Lucas (my husband) was working that particular Sunday morning so the kids and I were driving solo to church.  In the car on the 15 minute drive I began to really get down on myself.  I did it again.  I allowed myself to get frazzled, let little things bother me.  I'm such a bad mom.  Why can't I get this under control??  

We got into church, I dropped the kids off in their classrooms and headed into worship.  As we began to sing those words came back to me - You're such a hypocrit standing here singing as if you didn't have a tough morning.  You really need to get yourself in control.  You're no where near where you should be at this point.  Get it together!  Then suddenly a though occurred to me which I have spoken to myself many times since then:

The Enemy will say, "Look how far you have to go!  Might as well give up because you'll never get there!"  God says, "Look how far I've brought you!  Can you trust Me to complete the work I started?"

I spent the rest of worship in tears as He brought to memory truly how far I've come.  I was raised in a "broken" family and faced my fair share of difficulties as a child, but somehow came away without becoming a "statistic."  The Enemy primed me to fall into all the temptations of a young person in my situation, BUT GOD protected me and brought me through it all.  I'm not where I want to be, but God has brought me so much healing that I'm not sure my high school self would recognize me now!  

Praise God that He finished what He completes!  I am not a finished product, but a work in progress.  I still have a long way to go, but I don't go it alone!

If you're like me and have those moments where you start barrading yourself for not being better, smarter, calmer, faster, more mature, more put together . . . more . . . better . . .  STOP.  Take a moment and think back a month, a year, ten years.  Pause and notice how far God has brought you and then make a conscience (maybe even outloud) declaration that you will trust Him to complete what He started!

And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue His work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.  ~ Philippians 1:6

There's a Lesson In This

While so much fun seeing all of our families, this Christmas season was long and tiring.  After traveling three weekends in a row we were all so ready to be home where the kids could play with their new toys and we could all sleep in our own beds.  And then on our second day home the littlest wakes up with a stomach bug, followed by the oldest, then mommy.  :(  Not exactly how we planned to enjoy our new toys and time at home, BUT there's a lesson in this . . .

During our driving this holiday and in the days leading up to the New Year, I took some time to sit and consider what I wanted out of this new beginning.  I put in some extra prayer time and Scripture reading and while many were coming up with words for the new year, I felt like God placed this little phrase in my mind - work smarter, not harder.  You see, I'm from the mindset that in order to expect big things (and really feel like you're doing anything worthwhile), you have to work hard and put in the time.  Unfortunately, this mindset has left me strained, stressed, and overwhelmed.  Not to mention feeling like a failure in many areas of my life.  God's gentle instruction opened up a whole new idea.  Slowly He's been showing me to put Him first, follow where He leads, and do only what is needed in each area without going overboard (I often dive in head first and want a years worth of work done in about an hour, just ask my husband!).  

While my children have been sick, I've done countless loads of laundry, cleaned furniture and carpets, snuggled sick babies, and worked only in the few minutes I can each day.  And you know what?  I haven't been stressing.  In fact, I feel as though I've been more successful in my endeavors because I haven't pushed.  I haven't had time to overthink.  And I've been trusting the Lord so much more.  Trusting that He will lead me in the direction I need to be and not trying to do something beyond that.  Accepting that He has good things for me, even if they don't look like what I thought.

He has confirmed this to me in a couple ways over the last 24 hours.  First involved an incredible book I'm reading called Breaking Busy by Alli Worthington.  In my reading she talks about our God-given purpose and our need to be obedient to that purpose, knowing He can do so much more through us when we follow the plan He has.  The second was through an audio teaching by Priscilla Shirer. I have a devotional CD of hers that plays whenever I'm driving and in this particular message she talks about hearing a prize winning tomato farmer share how important pruning is to producing the largest, ripest fruit.  She goes on to talk about how sometimes we have to prune good things in order to grow better things.  It's funny because they also both point out various times in Scripture where Jesus Himself reminds the people why He came.  For example, after healing many people, the whole town came out to where Jesus was staying and attempted to keep Him there so He could continue to heal them.  This was His response:

But He said, I must proclaim the good news of the kingdom of God to the other towns also, because that is why I was sent."  - Luke 4:43

Both ladies pointed out that Jesus didn't just come to do the Father's Will, but that He did the Father's Will and nothing else.  It would have been good for Him to stay and heal them, but that's not what He was called to do.  Just as I am not called to work myself ragged in every area, trying to trudge my own path and force everything to work the way I want under my control.  I must work smarter, not harder.  For me, this means spending more time with the Lord, listening to His guidance, and being obedient even when I don't know how it will turn out.

I'd love to hear if God has given you a word or phrase for this new year.  Or perhaps He's in the midst of teaching you a new lesson.  I'd love to hear that too!

Be Strong and Courageous

Y'all, it has been a month!  Haha!  After traveling three weekends in a row, we are all so thankful to be in our own home for the foreseeable future.  While seeing family and friends is wonderful, there's just something about being in your own space where I can let the kids roam and know there's nothing they can really get into!

If you've ever read one of my posts, you know that I try to be as honest and transparent as possible.  Well, here we go again!  I am, in general, a very anxious person.  I have a habit of overthinking decisions, rethinking decisions, regretting decisions, and oftentimes just being overall nervous about decisions I make.  Take for instance today.  I needed to place an order online.  It took me hours to figure out what to purchase, not to mention the taking things out of my cart to add others in only to take those out and go back to what I had before to finally taking everything and only purchasing what I originally planned on doing!  Ok, get the picture?  So here we go . . .

I work for a direct sales company and, therefore, can run my business however I so choose.  That is both very freeing and also nerve-wracking for someone like me.  I get anxious about whether I've made the right decision, if I'm planning as I should, if I'm being too salesy with friends, etc.  It was starting to really get out of control so I took a moment after the kids fell asleep to read some Scripture and pray.  Here's the verse I found myself meditating on:

Have I not commanded you?  Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.  - Joshua 1:9

It's a pretty common verse, but as I thought about today I realized there's really two parts to it.  I am not to afraid or discouraged because God is with me.  But that requires that I be taking time to listen and obey where He leads me.  Joshua was also instructed many times to follow the Lord's commands.  He didn't have to be afraid because he knew that where he went is where God called him to be.  It didn't mean things would be easy and, if you've read their story, it wasn't, but it did mean Joshua didn't have to be anxious or afraid.

It was a strong reminder for me to put my decisions in His hands.  Ask Him how I should run my business, raise my kids, spend my time, and then take a moment to listen and see what He says.  I don't mean an audible voice (although sometimes that would be lovely), but where I feel my passions leading, where I feel peace, where I feel challenged.  God speaks to us in different ways, but if we are quiet and still enough to listen, we will hear His voice.

As my little man would say, "Be strong and courageous, God is with ME!"

For The Weary Mama

In a season of feeling stressed and overwhelmed with two little ones, a new (to me) ministry, and a small business (not to mention typical household chores), I have truly recognized my need to get back into the Word regularly to gain clarity, strength, and wisdom.  After my daughter was born in mid-February, it was a steep learning curve figuring out how to accomplish anything with two under two in the house.  I had to figure out what worked so I could make dinner, fold laundry, get through the grocery store (!), and, not surprisingly, how to do it with limited sleep!  I'm sure many of you can relate.  So here's me trying to get in a better rhythm.

My plan of action is to focus on the book of John (I just needed somewhere to start without something else to think about each time I sat down!).  I'm probably a week into this idea of reading a chapter a day and just finished John 4!  But my tired, weary, anxious mind got a lot of encouragement today as I read these familiar stories.  Things I never noticed before seemed to stand out.

Let's start here, " . . . tired as [Jesus] was from the journey . . . " (John 4:6b).  Did you catch that? Jesus understands how it feels to be tired!  He can relate to me!  It may seem small and I've rushed past it many times, but when you get so stressed you feel as though you're failing daily, there's encouragement in knowing Jesus knows how tired I am and what that feels like!  Phew!

Here's some more encouragement for the weary mama - just a few verses later, Jesus says to the woman at the well, ". . . the water I give him will become in him like a spring of water . . . "  (John 4:14b).  It renews and refreshes itself.  And we have this spring (the Holy Spirit) within us!  How often I forget that the same power that raised Jesus from the dead lives within me (Romans 6)!  I have become very aware of a little mantra that runs through my mind (and out of my mouth) when things get tough.  You might recognize it, it goes like this, "I can't!  I can't!  I just can't!"  The truth is, He can!  While there is some truth in that - in and of myself I can't - it's not the whole truth.  Enter God! I can't, but He can and His power is at work within me.  This gives me hope.  Will I remember this truth every time I get overwhelmed?  No.  But the more I remind myself, the more quickly this truth will come when the moments become too much.

It's not much, but hopefully these passages encouraged you as they did me.  And remember, mama, you're doing GREAT!

Nothing to Prove

This morning our pastor made a statement that really spoke to me.  He said -

"God approves of you.  You have nothing more to prove."

It seems so simple yet it is so incredibly powerful.  There is so much pressure to be "perfect" - clean house, well-behaved children, fit body, stylish wardrobe, healthy eating, ample finances, etc.  Truth is, trying to live out all of those expectations is exhausting and unrealistic.  It keeps us stressed, tense, and critical of others as we compare ourselves constantly to see if we've "met the mark."  When we realize that we are already fully approved by God, the task of "proving ourselves worthy" is complete and we experience REST - freedom from expectation.  We are able to sit back, spend time with God, learn more about how He created us (skills, gifts, and talents) and focus more on using the amazing, unique abilities He's given each of us.  And guess what!  When we work from a place of rest, out of the gifts He's given, we find JOY, PEACE, PURPOSE, and FULFILLMENT!

There's no special formula.  Nothing we have to do to get there.  We just have to realize it's already been done.  God looks at us and says, "My child, I love you and approve of you.  You will always be my child and I will always love you."  

Lord, let us rest in the knowledge that You love us and fully approve of us.  The work of being "good enough" is over because You have already fully accepted us.  Reveal to us the unique talents You've given us and help us explore them from a place of rest in a way that honors You.  Amen.

When The Storm Comes

Some days or seasons it feels as though the clouds have parted and the very light from heaven is beaming down on you. Everything is going great! Your relationship with God is amazing, you and your spouse are connecting on a very close, intimate level, you feel like you have your feet under you when it comes to caring for the kids, and life just couldn't get any better. It's a mountaintop season and you are loving life.

Then there are those other times. Where you know God is there, but the dark clouds have rolled in and it seems like the thunder drowns out His voice as the lightning strikes and the rain comes down so hard you have to duck your head, close your eyes, and just run for shelter. That might seem a bit dramatic, but maybe you're there right now and it is all too real. Or maybe it's somewhere in between. The last several weeks have been a stormy season for my family and I in general. My step dad was very ill over the summer (I'm talking ICU ill) and is still not out of the woods although being out of the hospital. In the last week his sister had emergency surgery for an infected finger, then his mother passed away, then...then....then.... You get the idea. It starts to feel like the rain will never end and with each bolt of lightning comes another unexpected, blinding blow. I confessed to my husband and my God the other day that I just don't know what to do. I hate seeing my loved ones suffer, but know there is little to nothing I can do to "fix" the situation. It is unreal the number of ways God has spoken encouragement to me over the last several days following this confession. I don't have a tried and true way to resolve this, but I can pass along the tidbits of encouragement He has given me and encourage you to make the same confessions if you find yourself in a similar situation. And understand, the situation itself hasn't changed, but my perspective has been adjusted. Here are just a few encouragements:

The morning after making this confession I was trying to get my 8 month old fed, changed, dressed, and happy to go to our bi-weekly Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPs) meeting.  And it was just one of those mornings.  He refused to eat, had to be changed again before we got out the door, and cried in the car seat until he finally settled down . . . and we ran into traffic.  During this time God gave me the peace of mind to pray – "Lord, do something!  I can't do all of this."  And suddenly a song came on.  I don't normally have the radio on, but Jesus knew.  It started like this – "Well forgive me, forgive me if I'm wrong, but this looks like more than I can do on my own."  Boy did that get my attention.  It was my prayer!  Here's where it ended:

I can do all things
Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don't have to be
Strong enough
Strong enough

("Strong Enough" by Matthew West)

I don't have to be strong enough.  In and of myself I'm not strong enough.  BUT God is!  I can have peace knowing He is strong enough and I can rest easy in that.

The next encouragement was very simple.  As we left that meeting I got behind a mini-van whose license plate was very simply "God Wins."  What a great reminder!  Yeah, life is tough right now, but in the end I know that God wins!

Many of the troubles my family faces right now I find hard to believe will every truly change.  They are "impossible."  Things I have grown accustomed to and, if I'm completely honest, I have lost faith will ever be different.  So here's how God got me there:

We say, "I always failed there, and I always will."  Consequently, we don't ask for what we want.  Instead, we think, "it is ridiculous to ask God to do this."  If it is an impossibility, it is the very thing for which we have to ask.  If it is not an impossible thing, it is not a real disturbance.  And God will do what is absolutely impossible.  [My Utmost for His Highest}

Did you catch that?  God works in the impossible.  Too often I get bogged down in the idea that it will never change and so give up on praying for it . . . instead of going to the only One who has the ultimate power to reach down and change the impossible.  Man was that convicting to read!  So when I feel utterly helpless and out of control as I face hard situations, what am I to do?  Go to the One who is in complete control.  Don't write off prayer as "doing nothing."

Last one, I promise.  Sometimes we face hard moments.  We pray and ask God to do something, work in the impossible and nothing happens.  The person passes away, the illness gets worse, the finances don't appear, we don't get that promotion, and the list goes on.  What then?  It's a tough question and one that many people answer by walking away from their faith.  Here's the thing.  We need to trust that God is in absolute control.  He knows our situation, sees our pain, feels our pain, and has a plan.  His plan is not always what we want to happen, but we can trust that it is good because He cannot deny Himself.  He is a good Father. 

I heard this song on the radio that tough morning and it really encouraged me (and had me crying).  As I read over the words I find myself not just enjoying it, but making it my prayer and declaration.  Perhaps you'll do the same:

Letting go of every single dream
I lay each one down at Your feet
Every moment of my wandering
Never changes what You see

I’ve tried to win this war I confess
My hands are weary I need Your rest
Mighty Warrior, King of the fight
No matter what I face, You’re by my side

When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!

Truth is, You know what tomorrow brings
There’s not a day ahead You have not seen
So, in all things be my life and breath
I want what You want Lord and nothing less

When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!

You are my strength and comfort
You are my steady hand
You are my firm foundation; the rock on which I stand

Your ways are always higher
Your plans are always good
There’s not a place where I’ll go, You’ve not already stood

When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!

I will trust in You!
I will trust in You!
I will trust in You!

["Trust in You" by Lauren Daigle]

My Heart Breaks

I sit down to watch the news to find a special on the Syrian refugee crisis.  As I watch them pan the camera around a huge room full of cots I spot an infant climbing on one of the beds and suddenly I'm transported there.  This is my child, my reality.  Just a few months ago things got so bad I had to grab a backpack and decide which items in my home were of most importance.  What would give us a higher chance of survival?  I pack up items for my infant child and figure out how to carry all of this and leave my home.  I don't know exactly where I'm going, but all I know is anywhere is safer than here.  I pray we will find food before what we have runs out.  I hope there will be a place where we can find water along the way and maybe even a place to get out of the elements.  All I know is anywhere is safer than here.  I walk and walk for hundreds of miles carry the single bag we could hold and try to comfort my son only to find myself denied access to go any farther or get any help.  Or perhaps I do make it into a refugee camp and find myself gated into a room where I have generously been given a cot, some food, and water, but what kind of life is this for my child?  At least he's alive and, for the moment, safe, but where do we go from here?  Is this our life?  Relegated to a room full of cots?  And just like that I'm back in my living room sitting on my couch watching the news and weeping.  My son is safe and I am sitting well fed and hydrated with a roof over my head, but what of that woman's child?  What of her life?  What of her husband who looks at his family and cries inside wishing he could provide more for them?  I pray earnestly for them and can't even express the physical weight I feel at the thought of what those families are facing.

With all of this heartache I turn on social media only to find so many people saying such hateful things and expressing a desire to deny these people any peace, protection, or future.  And, yet again, my heart breaks.  This time not for the physical needs of people, but for spiritual needs.  Many of those I see fighting to keep these refugees away are Christians.  I read them and think, Have they forgotten?  What does God's Word say?  Has He ever commanded us to ignore those in need?  Quite the opposite!  Verse after verse, word after word commands us to love, show compassion, offer food, give shelter.  We are even told to pray for our enemies!  So how can we justify such hateful responses while still claiming to follow Christ's example?  (You do know Christian means "little Christ," right?)

The justification of many is they fear a terrorist will slip in through the cracks and harm us.  I understand that fear, but can I be blatantly honest with you?  If that is your thinking, the terrorists and our ultimate Enemy have already won.  You have allowed them to persuade you to turn your back on those in need (and God's Word) to fulfill the fleshly desire to protect your own at any cost.  Is it wrong to want your family safe?  Absolutely not!  But if your actions go against the Word of God, in my humble opinion, you are wrong.  Understand that everything I say I put myself in that position and wonder, could I do it?  Would I want a refugee family staying in my home?  How would I feel?  Perhaps it is the Lord's grace for me in this situation, but I would gladly take a family in, knowing this is what God calls me to do - provide shelter, food, water, protection, and love.  Would it be challenging?  Yes.  But I have chosen to trust that whatever the Lord calls me to do He has purpose for.  And He will give me the strength, provision, and protection needed to carry out His Will in my life and in my family's life.  I can only do this by placing my faith in Him alone, not on earthly securities, military power, or my own abilities. 

I typically stay away from controversial topics, but this particular one has broken my heart, both for the Syrian refugees and the state of Christianity in America.  I apologize if I stepped on any toes, but I felt it needed to be said.  And if you are offended, I encourage you to go to Scripture and let me know if I have said anything that does not align with God's Word. 

Finally, I want to encourage you to read a wonderful article put out by Relevant Magazine entitled "What the Bible says About How to Treat Refugees."  The article is simply a list of verses with a one sentence header for each summarizing what action that verse calls us to take.  You can find the article here.

Tid Bits

As my life has changed much over the last several months I realize how fast-paced our society is.  We often claim we don't have time to sit over a devotion or quiet time for long and therefore miss out on what God is speaking.  In response to this I feel as though God has been leading me to change how I present these posts.  Rather than long stories or explanations that only a few truly have time to read I want to share the tid bits that God draws out of the Scriptures for me each morning as I get in a few minutes with Him before my days starts.

Today I was reading in Matthew 26 and God highlighted a few truths from this passage:

A woman came to Jesus with an alabaster jar of very costly ointment, and she poured it on His head as e sat at the table.  But when the disciples saw it, they were angry and said, "Why this waste?" . . . But Jesus, aware of this, said to them, "Why do you trouble the woman?  She has performed a good service for me.  ~ Matthew 26:7-8, 10

Too often we become focused on the opinions of others and it cripples our ability to serve God.  This woman did something incredible for Jesus, something He praised her for and promised that wherever the Good News would be proclaimed that her story would be told (Matt 26:13).  Praise God that her focus was upon serving Jesus and not upon the opinions of others.  For she obeyed what God called her to do regardless of what others might think.

Then one of the twelve, who was called Judas Iscariot, went to the chief priests and said, "What will you give me if I betray Him to you?"  ~ Matthew 26:14

Judas' betrayal of Jesus was done out of selfishness and a self-focused perspective.  He was more concerned about what would be given to him than what would happen to Jesus because of his actions.  Lord, let our focus be upon You rather than upon ourselves.  For we know that You are the giver of every good and perfect gift (James 1:17).  There is nothing this world can offer that would be greater than what You give.  Help me, Jesus, to be more focused on You, Your Name, and Your Glory than upon my own.  Amen.

Jesus said to Judas, "Friend, do what you are here to do."  Then they came and laid hands on Jesus and arrested Him.  ~  Matthew 26:50

Knowing what Judas has come to do and the pain Jesus will face because of that choice, Jesus calls him "friend."  What hope that gives us!  What love, that in spite of all the times we have hurt, denied, and turned our backs on Jesus, He calls us friend.

Then Peter began to curse, and he swore on oath, I do not know the man!"  At that moment the cock crowed.  Then Peter remembered what Jesus had said: "Before the cock crows, you will deny me three times."  And he went out and wept bitterly. ~ Matthew 26:74-75

How often I forget the truth of God's Word and need a reminder like Peter received.  God has spoken so much truth to us through Scripture - words of peace, strength, joy, power - that we quickly forget, especially when we are in difficult situations and need it most.  Lord, let us be accepting of the reminders of Your Truth.  Let our pride not get in the way of taking these words of power and wisdom to heart, letting them soak into us that they might effect change from the inside out.

Peace, Quiet, and God

Recently I was going through a time where I was really stressed.  It seemed like everything was coming due at the same time and I had to work nonstop to even begin completing everything on my "to do" list.  I was getting so frustrated and almost depressed because there was so much to do and so little time.  All I really wanted to do was crawl under my covers and sleep, take a walk, read a book, watch a movie, anything other than those things I "had" to do.  It was during this time that God started to speak to me about something I had often heard of, but had never truly followed . . . Sabbath.

Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it He rested from all the work of creating that He had done.  ~ Genesis 2:3

God is the all-powerful creator of the universe.  Do you think He really needed to take a break?  I believe God used this as an example for us.  We are not meant to work non-stop.  We need breaks.  Throughout the Old Testament, and into the New Testament, we see the importance of the Sabbath day.  It was a time for the people of God to rest in His Presence without working.  I love how Deitrich Bonhoeffer discussed the Sabbath.  He wrote there is "no commandment to work, but there is a commandment to rest from work . . . God knows that the work we do can gain so much power over us we can no longer leave it alone . . . It is not work that supports us, but God alone . . . The Sabbath rest is the visible sign that human beings live by the grace of God and not by works . . . "

Perhaps you're like me, a workaholic.  I can't seem to stop working.  If there is something to be done I'll keep working until it's completed.  The problem is there is always something to be done!  As Bonhoeffer wrote, work had power over me and I could not leave it alone.  It was at this time that God really began encouraging me to take a weekly Sabbath. 

So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak.  When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob's hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man.  Then the man said, "Let me go, for it is daybreak."  But Jacob replied, "I will not let you go unless you bless me."  The man asked him, "What is your name?"  "Jacob," he answered.  Then the man said, "Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome." ~ Genesis 32:24-28

After [Jesus] had dismissed them, He went up on a mountainside by Himself to pray.  Later that night, He was there alone.  ~ Matthew 14:23

Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where He prayed.  ~ Mark 1:35

Do you notice a trend?  In each instance, and there are plenty more, we see the person by themselves and the passing of time.  In determining how God wanted me to spend my Sabbath He reminded me of two very important things. 

First, Sabbath isn't simply not working, it is actively taking time to spend with the Lord.  This is time that is set aside to spend with God.  Often we hear Sabbath in regard to not working, but it is so much more than that.  Yes, you aren't working, but that time is not replaced with just any leisure activity you choose.  This time needs to be spent with God.  In taking time to worship Your God He will refresh you and prepare you for the week to come. 

Second, Sabbath isn't to be rushed.  Not that I have already obtained this (Phil 3:13), but let me share what I've been doing as part of my observance of the Sabbath.  I live fairly near a state park so on Saturday afternoon I take my Bible and go for a walk.  I walk a pretty long distance, but here's the key – I don't wear a watch, my phone is on silent, I don't take people with me.  I've gotten into calling these my God walks.  It's a time where I can come before God without the distractions of my normal day.  There are no time limits or deadlines set on me, no amount of Scripture that I have to read before I say it's done.  No two walks are ever the same.  Each time God has something new to speak to me about.  And when I get away from the noise of my life and focus solely on Him it's amazing how much clearer His voice is, how the normal, everyday stresses seem so much smaller, and how He prepares me for the week by filling me anew with strength, courage, and peace.  As with Jacob in Genesis 32, I have come to find that when we take time with God and give Him our focus He will speak to you and bless that time you have given Him.  Never think of it as a waste of time that you could be doing other work.  When you give to the Lord I firmly believe that He blesses your offering if it is given with a sincere heart.  So many times I have taken time with God when I really didn't have it to give and suddenly my work went so much faster and I was much more efficient that I had been before.

It's not always easy, but I encourage you to pray about taking a Sabbath.  Take some time to just spend with God.  Get away from the distractions and listen to Him.  We all need time of peace, quiet, and God.

Bear in mind that the Lord has given you the Sabbath . . . ~ Exodus 16:29a

"For your first time you truly repent"

This past weekend a wonderful thing happened.  My cousin accepted Jesus as his personal savior!  :) 

"In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents."  ~ Luke 15:10

Just a few days after this glorious decision, he wrote this poem.  I was pretty blown away and wanted to share it with you:

As she stares with her scarlet eyes,
Her white face pale with dishonesty,
She finds humor as beauty dies,
And fills the gap with hypocrisy.

You open your mouth, you're voice is lame
You open your eyes, you see she's near
You open your ears, she speaks her name
You gasp for air, for she is fear

Your mind and body are screaming for help
For your first time you truly repent
She touches your skin as you start to yelp
You hear a voice, "your help is sent"

Closing your eyes, you're blinded by light
Closing your mouth, you're robbed of air
You open your eyes to a beautiful sight
He's smiling upon you, you're free of despair.

~ Michael Malendoski

Praising at Midnight

About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. ~ Acts 16:25

How you react to difficult times can be an awesome witness to people around you. In the passage in Acts 16 Paul and Silas were severely flogged before being chained in an “inner cell” in the prison for casting out a demon in a woman. They were obeying what God asked them to do, but still faced this terrible ordeal of being beaten and imprisoned. If anyone had a right to be grumpy or upset, it was them. Notice, however, what they chose to do. They “were praying and singing hymns to God!” They knew that even in this God was in control and that they had obeyed Him. The best part of this verse though is the second half – “other prisoners were listening to them!” Other people are going to watch your reaction as you go through these things. Can you imagine the testimony and witness we would have if we chose to praise God even in the midst of our darkest hour? They were doing this at midnight, a time of day when there is no light from the sun - literally their darkest hour!

How you react to the hard times is made up of choices. You can choose whether you will remain bitter and upset about your situation or if you will praise God in the midst of it all and be a walking testimony of God’s faithfulness. Don’t believe that it is out of your control what you do. As my pastor has said many times, “Your feelings are meant to be felt, not lead you.”

Paul and Silas chose to praise Him and the next verse shows what God can do when you praise and trust Him:

Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everybody’s chains came loose. ~ Acts 16:26

Consider these:

Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember you! ~ Psalm 42:5a


This is what the Lord says: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my gracious promise to bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. ~ Jeremiah 29:10-13


I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.” ~ Lamentations 3:19-24


You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. ~ 1 John 4:4

No Carry Ons

[Jesus] told them: “Take nothing for the journey – no staff, no bag, no bread, no money, no extra tunic.” ~ Luke 9:3


I have some friends that travel internationally quite often. They’ve told me a lot of creative ways to get around the weight limits for check-in luggage and how best to get everything to your destination without having to pay extra. One of them frequently wears multiple layers of clothes on the plane so it doesn’t add to the weight of the check-in and she doesn’t have to shove it into her tiny carry-on bag! The only problem with this plan is how uncomfortable she is once she’s on the plane. With all this extra clothing she is either really warm or has to shed a few layers and hold on to them. Either way it causes an inconvenience and hinders her ability to have a nice flight. It’s the same way with some of the things we try to carry with us in our relationship with God.

Jesus spoke about some very tangible things that would hinder them, such as a staff, bag, bread, money, and tunic, but it works just the same with emotional baggage – fear, timidity, anxiety, pride, etc. The more we try to take with us on the journey the more weighed down we become. The harder it is to walk down that terminal to your flgith. When the crowds press in or the time is short, the luggage gets heavier and heavier. Perhaps you are at a time in your life where things are just tough. You feel like you’re caught in the middle of storm. Maybe finances are dwindling, relationships are going sour, things just aren’t going like you would have planned. The more baggage you carry, the more you try to hold onto, the harder it is to run into His arms. By holding onto all of these things you keep yourself in a mindset that says you can make it all better on your own. You are refusing to allow God to step and set your free.

When you accept Christ as your Savior, He releases you from your old life. You are a new creation in Him (2 Corinthians 5:17)!

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. ~ Romans 12:2a

You don’t have to follow what the world around you is saying. Allow your mind to be renewed. God has a different plan for you than society does. When you step out in faith and release these things in your life (fear, timidity, finances, anxiety, etc.) you give Him the opportunity to step in and provide beyond what you could have imagined. It is hard sometimes to release these things when everything you have been taught by the world says you should not let go.  (This is a somewhat separate topic, but I feel like a lot people do this with unforgiveness.  If you are dealing with a past hurt that people around you say you have the right to hold a grudge or remain angry with this person, you need to release them.  Not forgiving them is only hurting you.  When you let go of that hurt, you allow God to step in and heal your broken heart.  It's hard to a heal the wound you hold open.)

Just a little further in the chapter we have the story of the five loaves and two fish (Luke 9:12-17). They were in a situation where they didn’t have anything with them to feed this huge crowd of people, but God provided a simple boxed lunch that Jesus blessed and used to feed everyone and still have leftovers. Many of us, myself included, feel we have to worry about things because that’s the only way we’ll receive what we need. We worry about finances because we think we have to figure out how to get enough money to take of ourselves. We worry about having enough food, clothing, shelter, etc. We serve a God who provides. When you give these cares to God He will provide beyond what you could have done on your own. By giving these things up we are telling God that we trust Him to see us through to the end. And, trust me, He does not disappoint!

Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. ~ 1 Peter 5:7

Isaiah 32

Before my devotions this morning I was reflecting on my pastor's series on relationships. I was asking God to bring me wisdom in relationships. Asking that I wouldn't be confused. That I wouldn't have to question whether I was truly obeying Him or my own desires. He led me to Isaiah 32. It was so amazing that I wanted to share the passage with you and some of the thoughts He brought to mind as I read along:

1 See, a king will reign in righteousness

and rulers will rule with justice.
2 Each man will be like a shelter from the wind

and a refuge from the storm,

like streams of water in the desert

and the shadow of a great rock in a thirsty land.

God showed me there were two ways I could look at this. 1. Each and every man can offer this comfort and shelter. We can be what people need. 2. Every man will seem like a good one. They will seem to offer comfort and shelter. They will be a refuge. Continue reading to see about these men . . .

3 Then the eyes of those who see will no longer be closed,
and the ears of those who hear will listen.
4 The mind of the rash will know and understand,
and the stammering tongue will be fluent and clear.
5 No longer will the fool be called noble
nor the scoundrel be highly respected.
6 For the fool speaks folly,
his mind is busy with evil:
He practices ungodliness
and spreads error concerning the LORD;
the hungry he leaves empty
and from the thirsty he withholds water.
7 The scoundrel's methods are wicked,
he makes up evil schemes
to destroy the poor with lies,
even when the plea of the needy is just.
8 But the noble man makes noble plans,
and by noble deeds he stands.

Your eyes wil be closed no longer. You will be able to tell the scoundrel from the noble man. You will not get caught up with someone who will leave you hungry and thirsty because he is not the one for you!

9 You women who are so complacent,
rise up and listen to me;
you daughters who feel secure,
hear what I have to say!
10 In little more than a year
you who feel secure will tremble;
the grape harvest will fail,
and the harvest of fruit will not come.

Those who feel secure in relationships with scoundrels will "in little more than a year" tremble because the pleasant fields will fail. The happiness they have will begin to fade away as they start to recognize the scoundrel for who he is.

11 Tremble, you complacent women;
shudder, you daughters who feel secure!
Strip off your clothes,
put sackcloth around your waists.
12 Beat your breasts for the pleasant fields,
for the fruitful vines
13 and for the land of my people,
a land overgrown with thorns and briers—
yes, mourn for all houses of merriment
and for this city of revelry.
14 The fortress will be abandoned,
the noisy city deserted;
citadel and watchtower will become a wasteland forever,
the delight of donkeys, a pasture for flocks,

The house will be empty. The joy in that time will have past. But God's framework for relationships is FOREVER! Your joy is not intended to leave in this relationship . . .

15 till the Spirit is poured upon us from on high,
and the desert becomes a fertile field,
and the fertile field seems like a forest.
16 Justice will dwell in the desert
and righteousness live in the fertile field.
17 The fruit of righteousness will be peace;
the effect of righteousness will be quietness and confidence forever.

Wait for the Spirit to be poured out. It will bring a fertile field and will grant you quietness and confidence. When you wait for the Spirit and don't go off to find that "someone" on your own, you will be filled with quietness and confidence that will last FOREVER!

18 My people will live in peaceful dwelling places,
in secure homes,
in undisturbed places of rest.
19 Though hail flattens the forest
and the city is leveled completely,
20 how blessed you will be,
sowing your seed by every stream,
and letting your cattle and donkeys range free.

At this point I thought of marriage. This whole passage seems to move through a relationship and at this point it speaks of strong relationship. As storms and trials come against those around you who entered into relationship without waiting for the Spirit, you will be secure! Your house will be an "undisturbed place of rest!" Not only will you be at peace, but you will be able to "sow your seed by every stream!

Wait for the Lord and you will not fail!