For The Weary Mama

In a season of feeling stressed and overwhelmed with two little ones, a new (to me) ministry, and a small business (not to mention typical household chores), I have truly recognized my need to get back into the Word regularly to gain clarity, strength, and wisdom.  After my daughter was born in mid-February, it was a steep learning curve figuring out how to accomplish anything with two under two in the house.  I had to figure out what worked so I could make dinner, fold laundry, get through the grocery store (!), and, not surprisingly, how to do it with limited sleep!  I'm sure many of you can relate.  So here's me trying to get in a better rhythm.

My plan of action is to focus on the book of John (I just needed somewhere to start without something else to think about each time I sat down!).  I'm probably a week into this idea of reading a chapter a day and just finished John 4!  But my tired, weary, anxious mind got a lot of encouragement today as I read these familiar stories.  Things I never noticed before seemed to stand out.

Let's start here, " . . . tired as [Jesus] was from the journey . . . " (John 4:6b).  Did you catch that? Jesus understands how it feels to be tired!  He can relate to me!  It may seem small and I've rushed past it many times, but when you get so stressed you feel as though you're failing daily, there's encouragement in knowing Jesus knows how tired I am and what that feels like!  Phew!

Here's some more encouragement for the weary mama - just a few verses later, Jesus says to the woman at the well, ". . . the water I give him will become in him like a spring of water . . . "  (John 4:14b).  It renews and refreshes itself.  And we have this spring (the Holy Spirit) within us!  How often I forget that the same power that raised Jesus from the dead lives within me (Romans 6)!  I have become very aware of a little mantra that runs through my mind (and out of my mouth) when things get tough.  You might recognize it, it goes like this, "I can't!  I can't!  I just can't!"  The truth is, He can!  While there is some truth in that - in and of myself I can't - it's not the whole truth.  Enter God! I can't, but He can and His power is at work within me.  This gives me hope.  Will I remember this truth every time I get overwhelmed?  No.  But the more I remind myself, the more quickly this truth will come when the moments become too much.

It's not much, but hopefully these passages encouraged you as they did me.  And remember, mama, you're doing GREAT!

Encourage One Another

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. - 1 Thessalonians 5:11

Over the past couple of weeks I have seen so many posts, articles, comments, etc. of moms very aggressively sharing their views on mothering.  While sharing these opinions in and of themselves is not wrong, the manner in which I have seen it is. I read verses like the one above and weep a little.  We are called to encourage one another and build each other up . . . but is that "just as in fact [we] are doing?"  When I read a post, especially one between Christian mothers, that leaves my stomach turning, not because of the advice or opinions, but because of the tone, words, and anger behind them, it hurts my heart.  I'm not the first to say all of this and I'm sure I won't be the last.  Being a mom is hard work!  We have so much to decide on - sleeping, eating, playtime, outdoor playing, screen time, music, education, even diapers for goodness sakes!  And each one of us will make those decisions.  We'll have opinions of why our choice is best and maybe are so convinced at how great our decision was that we want to share it with others.  No matter what decision we make, one thing is the same.  We want the best for our child.  We want them to feel loved, to succeed, to know the Lord, to see His work in our lives, to be healthy, to be encouraged . . . and the list goes on.

I don't know the perfect answer to all of these decisions for every mama in the world, but what I do know is this.  God gave me my son.  And He gave me to him.  I know him better than any other person on this planet.  I know my family better than any other person on this planet.  And God trusted me with them.  He gave me the ability to think and make decisions.  He taught me to trust Him and turn to Him when those decisions are hard.  He taught me to listen to Him and stand firm in obedience even when it didn't make sense to others (or even myself).  How God has led me to raise my children may not be the same as He led you, but know that it doesn't change my opinion of you and it will not change my support of you.  

Being a mama is hard, but you are doing a great job!  How do I know?  Because if you are following the Lord and calling on Him to help raise your child, you are making the best decisions (even the hard ones) and are leaning on the best Father there ever was or will be to give you wisdom.  He knows you and your child intimately, after all He formed your child in your womb (Psalm 139)!  He has plans for you and your child and His plans are good and are never thwarted (Jeremiah 29:11, Job 42:2).

My purpose in this post is to encourage mamas to remember how hard it is and rather than make those decisions harder for other mamas, encourage them.  Offer advice if it's asked for, but encourage whatever decision they make.  If you think they've made the wrong decision, pray that the Lord would lead them to a different decision, but ultimately trust that God will lead them in what is best for their child.  

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. - Hebrews 10:24-25

Nothing to Prove

This morning our pastor made a statement that really spoke to me.  He said -

"God approves of you.  You have nothing more to prove."

It seems so simple yet it is so incredibly powerful.  There is so much pressure to be "perfect" - clean house, well-behaved children, fit body, stylish wardrobe, healthy eating, ample finances, etc.  Truth is, trying to live out all of those expectations is exhausting and unrealistic.  It keeps us stressed, tense, and critical of others as we compare ourselves constantly to see if we've "met the mark."  When we realize that we are already fully approved by God, the task of "proving ourselves worthy" is complete and we experience REST - freedom from expectation.  We are able to sit back, spend time with God, learn more about how He created us (skills, gifts, and talents) and focus more on using the amazing, unique abilities He's given each of us.  And guess what!  When we work from a place of rest, out of the gifts He's given, we find JOY, PEACE, PURPOSE, and FULFILLMENT!

There's no special formula.  Nothing we have to do to get there.  We just have to realize it's already been done.  God looks at us and says, "My child, I love you and approve of you.  You will always be my child and I will always love you."  

Lord, let us rest in the knowledge that You love us and fully approve of us.  The work of being "good enough" is over because You have already fully accepted us.  Reveal to us the unique talents You've given us and help us explore them from a place of rest in a way that honors You.  Amen.

My Heart Breaks

I sit down to watch the news to find a special on the Syrian refugee crisis.  As I watch them pan the camera around a huge room full of cots I spot an infant climbing on one of the beds and suddenly I'm transported there.  This is my child, my reality.  Just a few months ago things got so bad I had to grab a backpack and decide which items in my home were of most importance.  What would give us a higher chance of survival?  I pack up items for my infant child and figure out how to carry all of this and leave my home.  I don't know exactly where I'm going, but all I know is anywhere is safer than here.  I pray we will find food before what we have runs out.  I hope there will be a place where we can find water along the way and maybe even a place to get out of the elements.  All I know is anywhere is safer than here.  I walk and walk for hundreds of miles carry the single bag we could hold and try to comfort my son only to find myself denied access to go any farther or get any help.  Or perhaps I do make it into a refugee camp and find myself gated into a room where I have generously been given a cot, some food, and water, but what kind of life is this for my child?  At least he's alive and, for the moment, safe, but where do we go from here?  Is this our life?  Relegated to a room full of cots?  And just like that I'm back in my living room sitting on my couch watching the news and weeping.  My son is safe and I am sitting well fed and hydrated with a roof over my head, but what of that woman's child?  What of her life?  What of her husband who looks at his family and cries inside wishing he could provide more for them?  I pray earnestly for them and can't even express the physical weight I feel at the thought of what those families are facing.

With all of this heartache I turn on social media only to find so many people saying such hateful things and expressing a desire to deny these people any peace, protection, or future.  And, yet again, my heart breaks.  This time not for the physical needs of people, but for spiritual needs.  Many of those I see fighting to keep these refugees away are Christians.  I read them and think, Have they forgotten?  What does God's Word say?  Has He ever commanded us to ignore those in need?  Quite the opposite!  Verse after verse, word after word commands us to love, show compassion, offer food, give shelter.  We are even told to pray for our enemies!  So how can we justify such hateful responses while still claiming to follow Christ's example?  (You do know Christian means "little Christ," right?)

The justification of many is they fear a terrorist will slip in through the cracks and harm us.  I understand that fear, but can I be blatantly honest with you?  If that is your thinking, the terrorists and our ultimate Enemy have already won.  You have allowed them to persuade you to turn your back on those in need (and God's Word) to fulfill the fleshly desire to protect your own at any cost.  Is it wrong to want your family safe?  Absolutely not!  But if your actions go against the Word of God, in my humble opinion, you are wrong.  Understand that everything I say I put myself in that position and wonder, could I do it?  Would I want a refugee family staying in my home?  How would I feel?  Perhaps it is the Lord's grace for me in this situation, but I would gladly take a family in, knowing this is what God calls me to do - provide shelter, food, water, protection, and love.  Would it be challenging?  Yes.  But I have chosen to trust that whatever the Lord calls me to do He has purpose for.  And He will give me the strength, provision, and protection needed to carry out His Will in my life and in my family's life.  I can only do this by placing my faith in Him alone, not on earthly securities, military power, or my own abilities. 

I typically stay away from controversial topics, but this particular one has broken my heart, both for the Syrian refugees and the state of Christianity in America.  I apologize if I stepped on any toes, but I felt it needed to be said.  And if you are offended, I encourage you to go to Scripture and let me know if I have said anything that does not align with God's Word. 

Finally, I want to encourage you to read a wonderful article put out by Relevant Magazine entitled "What the Bible says About How to Treat Refugees."  The article is simply a list of verses with a one sentence header for each summarizing what action that verse calls us to take.  You can find the article here.

He Delights in Me

Comparison.  My greatest temptation and the one area of my life that brings me the most sorrow, disappointment, and displeasure.  Perhaps this isn't an area you struggle with, but it has been a lifelong issue for me.  I compare my abilities, possessions, relationships, accomplishments, etc.  Every act I perform is held up next to someone else's similar act to see if I measure up, to see if I'm good enough.  When my son was born I had so many things I wanted to do with him - things I wanted to teach him, show him, and experience with him.  And in many ways I have done much of what I hoped to . . . with one small problem.  Each thing I did carried with it a question - "how will this compare with what so-and-so did?"  My old nemesis had sneaked its way into my relationship with my son.  Instead of doing things simply to enjoy him and love him, I did it in response to what others were doing.  I have been told over and over again, as I'm sure many mothers are, to cherish this time.  It seemed like such a strange suggestion.  Of course I'm going to cherish the time I have with my son.  Why wouldn't I?  And that is truly what I hoped to do, but comparison chipped away.  Trying to measure up and be "super mom" took away from just enjoying him.  It robbed me of the joy in the moment.   

This morning as my little man napped I read this verse and it has been on my heart all day:

He led me to a place of safety; He rescued me because He delights in me. - 2 Samuel 22:20

Here's the truth, God delights in me.  He rescued me and saved me not because of what I could do for Him or because of what I own, but because He created me and loves me.  There is no comparison.  He sees me as I am and delights in me.  I don't have to measure up.  I don't have to compete.  The same goes for being a mom.  Comparison makes me forget that God gave my son to me.  He will lead me in how to raise him.  He will teach me how to love my son unconditionally.  And how He leads me will very likely be different from other moms.  Is it wrong?  No.  It is better?  No. Is it a competition?  No.  I can delight with God in how He uses other moms in the lives of their children as I stand in amazement at how God leads me to be mommy to my Caleb.


I feel like Paul where he essentially says, "I don't speak as someone who has it all together, but I press on towards the goal" (Philippians 3:12).  I don't have this figured out.  I still struggle with comparing myself to others.  But what I take hope in is that Christ has grace for me and He will continually lead me as I venture ever farther into mommyhood.

You are NOT alone!

The other day I was driving down the interstate with my little buddy in the backseat.  We were coming up to a particularly bad area known for traffic so I merged into the far left lane in hopes of sneaking by the worst of it.  I had just started thinking how few cars were on the road when we came over the hill and were met with parked traffic.  :(  Apparently there was a very bad accident up ahead that had closed all lanes.  So much for making good time.  No worries though, little guy was quietly playing with his toys . . . until we had sat there about five minutes.  Suddenly he was wailing.  I assured him I felt the same way about the traffic and understood he was getting hungry, but there was nothing I could do.  We were suck in the far left lane next to two semis.  As 10, 20, 30 minutes passed I started becoming frantic.  My little guy was clearly miserable, needed mommy to hold him, and we were stuck!  I tried to turn on my blinker, but the semis couldn't go anywhere.  Finally there was a bit of a break and I hoped beyond hope that someone in the lane next to us could see our predicament and would let me over . . . no such luck.  I ended up calling mom (aren't moms great) who in turn called the state police to see what I should do (we had no idea when traffic would let up, only that little man wouldn't stop until he was out of that seat).  Basically, they told me to turn on my blinker, lay on the horn, roll down the window and yell at people - whatever I had to do to get to the off-ramp.  If you happen to know my personally, you probably know that's not likely to happen.  But as the traffic began to move again, a mom in the car next to me had begun to notice what was going on and motioned for me to come in front of her to get off the interstate!  Thank you, Jesus, for this mom who understood!  Who not only understood, but risked being cut of by others to let me in!!

Ok, that was a long description, but do you know the feeling?  You're having a hard time with your child, whatever that may look like, and you just want someone to give you a sympathetic smile, a helping hand, or even just to not look at you in judgment?!  Thankfully I was the only one who was bothered by my little guy, but I needed someone to help, someone to notice and offer assistance.  I heard a story the other day of a lady who brought her baby girl on a plane and was met with judgmental stares and rude comments . . . until the woman next to her offered to help.  Suddenly, that mom didn't feel so alone anymore.  Didn't feel so judged, so helpless.

I'm fairly certain that if you're a mom, you've experienced that feeling.  So what do we do about it?

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. - I Thessalonians 5:11

In simple terms, help each other.  Look out for each other.  Rather than give judgmental stares or unwanted advice, offer a kind smile.  Ask if there is anything you can do to help.  Meet a visible need.  Be the mom who shows other moms they're not alone.  Let's build each other up!

And to the mom who let me over - THANK YOU!

"When they had seen Him . . . "

First, a completely unrelated thought - Some days we feel so close to and on fire for God and the next day He feels distant.  Don't be discouraged, for God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow (Hebrews 13:8).  He never changes!  When we feel distant, we shouldn't give up or think He has left us, for those who ask, receive; those who seek, find; and those who knock find the door opened (Luke 11:10).

Now back to those shepherds (Luke 2:8-20):

Another thought to ponder - why shepherds?  There were plenty of other "common" people around.  Many people were in Bethlehem because of the census, yet God called some shepherds who were tending their flocks in a field outside of the city.  At the moment, the most logical answer for me is that God announced His Son's birth to shepherds first because Jesus would be the ultimate shepherd, laying down His life for His flock (John 10:11).

The next lesson came from Luke 2:17.  I have a passion for discipleship.  I love to support, encourage, and share in others' walks with Christ.  There is nothing more exciting than to see someone seek out and run full-force towards Him.  But the shepherds reminded me of something very important.  Notice the order of events in this verse.  "When they had seen Him . . . "  The first step was to encounter Christ for themselves.  They heard what they angels said, but before they told anyone else, they went to see for themselves.  It was only after they had that experience that they "spread the word concerning Him."  The crucial first step in living a life all-out for Christ is encountering Him for ourselves.  We cannot rely on the faith of our parents, grandparents, friends, etc.  We can't "ride their coattails" along this journey of faith.  We must make it our own by having our own encounter and experience with Christ. 

Finally, the shepherds' story ends in Scripture by saying they saw everything "just as they had been told" (Luke 2:20).  Our God is a God of Truth.  We can trust what He says!!

Continual Renewal

Take a moment and think back on your childhood.  How you acted, what you thought about certain things, or how mature you were.  Now compare that to who you are now.  Are there any differences?  For most of us we can see how throughout our lives we have grown in knowledge, experience, understanding, maturity, and in many other areas.  In Colossians we find a call to exhibit this same growth in our spiritual lives, in our relationship with Christ Jesus:

. . .  you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. – Colossians 3:9b-10

As I read this passage what stuck out to me was that in addition to the initial new self that we put on, we are being renewed.  This implies a continuous, ongoing action.  Our relationship with Christ was not a onetime deal where we put on the new self and were in that moment at the relationship level with Christ that He wanted us to remain at for our entire lives.  Just as our parents and older siblings look forward to a child's constant growth as they learn to walk, speak, reason, etc., our Father looks forward to those milestones of constant growth in our relationship with Him as well.  Peter talks about this in terms of moving from spiritual milk to meat in our understanding of God (1 Peter 2).

So how do we do this?  How do we maintain this constant renewal?

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. – Colossians 3:12

How often do you clothe yourself?  I'm really hoping you put clothes on every day!  So when Paul says to clothe yourselves with compassion, humility, gentleness and patience, I see it as something we are to do daily.  Again, this is not something we can do one time and hope that it sticks for the rest of our lives.  Just as our clothes, should we never change them, begin to smell and grow old, our compassion, humility, gentleness, and patience would grow stale without being refreshed and renewed daily.  One way to renew these traits daily is through encouragement through God's Word and dialogue with God through prayer.  Another way comes through fellowship with other Christians:

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. – Colossians 3:16

I love this verse!  Did you notice the word pastor, preacher, or leader in this verse?  No!  Why not?  Because this is the job of the Christian community and is not to be left for our leaders alone.  It requires the participation of every member of the body of Christ to teach one another and to come together to praise God and express our mutual thankfulness to Him for all He has done in our lives.  Consider another of Paul's letters:

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. – Hebrews 10:23-24

We have the opportunity and the honor of spurring one another on in good deeds, in worship, in service, in knowledge, and, in turn, in spiritual growth as we support one another.  Through prayer, the reading of God's Word, and fellowship with other believers who are encouraging and supporting one another as the body of Christ, we find ourselves being continually renewed in the image of our Creator.  Lest we grow sidetracked in our own growth and become proud in what we have accomplished, Paul reminds us to constantly point to the Lord as the One who makes possible this growth and all we do:

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. – Colossians 3:17

Where's the joy?

What has happened to all your joy? - Galatians 4:15a

A few weeks ago I returned from an incredible, life-changing trip to Ghana, West Africa.  While there I saw many things I had never seen before:  orphan children, people sleeping on streets without even a cardboard box to soften the concrete, malnourished children and adults . . . and pure, unadulterated joy.

Everything else I had prepared for, but not the joy.  As I sat and played with children who were orphaned, dirty, were wearing torn cloths, and a giant smile on their face I was astonished.  Part of me asked Do they know how bad their situation is?  Do they realize how little they have?  Watching this I couldn't help but consider how many American children live.  They have TVs, video games, movies, toys, iPods, every latest gadget, and yet most are miserable.

I began to realize these children had the "secret."  They had learned what Paul taught:

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.- Philippians 4:12-13

While there I was incredibly convicted of how much stuff I have, but that I lack something crucial - joy.  Praise God that He is the Provider of joy:

You became imitators of us and of the Lord, for you welcomed the message in the midst of severe suffering with the joy given by the Holy Spirit.  1 Thessalonians 1:6


Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy. - 1 Peter 1:8 

We are filled with an inexpressible joy when we believe in God and come to know Him more.  As we read about and experience His never-ending, all-consuming love for us we stand in awe and are filled with joy over our God who loves us and sent His Son to die that we might be saved!

This is my sincere prayer for you - that God would open your eyes to the magnitude of His love for you.  That you would begin to see that this love will never change, whether you have much or have little.  May God fill you with the inexpressible joy that can only come from Him.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.- Romans 15:13

The Good Shepherd's Path

The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for His Name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. – Psalm 23:1-4

Have you ever experienced a time in your life where you felt like your relationship with God was on fire?  You took time out of each day to pray, read God's Word, talk to Him, and just spend time with Him.  Difficult things would come up, but you immediately took them to the Lord and knew that, ultimately, He was in control.  Have you ever gotten so distracted by life, deadlines, work, etc. that you lost that? 

I was there just last week.  Finishing up classes for the semester – papers to write, final exams to take – totally took my focus off the Lord.  I still took time in the morning to do my devotions, but they just felt empty.  I would come to the end of the day, exhausted, and feel like I just didn't have any more strength, energy, or time to spend with God.  So instead I read books for fun, claiming it was a stress-release.  I watched movies and tv, pointing to my work load and saying I deserved it.  Yet I would still come to the end of my day and somehow claim I didn't have any leftover time for God.  Each day I felt more and more empty.  Assignments piled up, I stayed stressed, and the work never seemed to diminish.  Somehow I made it to the end of the semester, but I was drained.  And then I attended a service on campus where God showed me what I had been attempted to do:

You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth? That kind of persuasion does not come from the One who calls you. – Galatians 5:7-8

I realized that I was trying to do everything on my own.  I had been running a good race – following the Lord, leaning on Him, and then slowly started turning to my own interests, my own desires.  An image of a path came into my mind.  Instead of running on the path, however, I found myself running just to the side of it.  My feet were getting caught up in mud, my face was hit by branches, and I constantly had to dodge trees.  As I watched this scene in my mind I couldn't help but think, How silly!  Wouldn't it make so much more sense to run on that flat, straight path right there?  There are no branches to hit my face, no mud to slow me down, no trees to dodge.  In the midst of this thought the Lord very gently said, "Crystal, I've laid this path out just for you.  It's flat, straight, and firm.  You chose to step off the path and run.  When you're ready, the path is still there.  I'm not moving it.  Just step back onto it and I can help."

As I realized how easily I had stepped off the path I began to cry out to the Lord to set up guardrails, some sort of fence that would keep me from stepping so easily off the path.  Even as I prayed this God began to show me that He is the Good Shepherd.  As my Shepherd, His crook gently nudges me back to the path.  If I allow him to gently lead me with His crook, I'll never get stuck in that mud again.  I simply need to recognize the crook of my Shepherd, the sound of His voice:

"I am the Good Shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me--just as the Father knows me and I know the Father--and I lay down my life for the sheep. – John 10:14-15

God has a path laid out for your life and as your Good Shepherd He desires to see you thrive and flourish as you walk along that path.  When we try to make choices without His input, complete tasks without leaning on His strength, and live as if we have to figure everything out on our own, we get caught up in the mud of life.  Branches hit our face and trees come up before us.  But remember that your Father is also your Good Shepherd.  We can choose to rebel and push away from the crook He sets out to guide us on the path or we can recognize that He truly is the Good Shepherd and desires only the best for us.  When we do this we will see that crook not as something keeping us from things we want, but as a comfort and blessing that protects us and keeps us on the path.

Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. - Psalm 23:4b

The Annoying Kid Next Door

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! – 1 John 3:1a          

    
       As I wrote my last post on service and was thinking about God's mercy and the Church's response to Him I found myself sad on the Lord's behalf.  In my own experience I can remember how I've treated God at times, how I've pushed Him out of the way to make room for other things, how I've forgotten Him. 

    
        I think sometimes we forget what it means to have relationship with Christ.  We forget who He is in our lives.  Consider this:  you're at a big, fancy event and see this person that you really admire.  They're rich, world famous, powerful, influential.  You see them surrounded by a huge crowd and although you wish you could say hello you know there's no way you would get close enough to say anything, and even if you did, would they even notice you?  As you're standing in the corner contemplating this, that person sees you from a distance, calls out your name, and runs towards you!  They give you a giant hug, tell you how they've been waiting to meet you, and ask if you have any time coming up that you could hang out.  How do you respond?  Most of us would clear our calendars for as long as we could to hang out with that person!  I mean if this famous person wants to hang out with us, what could possibly get in the way of that, right?

     
       Now, imagine that person is Christ.  How do you respond?  It's sad to say many of us would respond completely different.  We'd pull out our calendars, hum and hull about some appointment we have, and end up asking if they could e-mail us later to find a date.  It's sad, but we think of Jesus more as the annoying kid next door that our mom makes us play with than this awesome, amazing God of the universe who desires to spend time with us. We spend time with Him because we feel like we're supposed to - after all, isn't it the "Christian thing to do?"   We pray and read our Bibles because we don't want to hurt God's feelings or because "mom said."  In truth, if you simply looked at the fact that we are but a vapor on this earth and He is the everlasting God, we should be so honored and amazed that He should want relationship with us, that He should even know our name, that we would clear our calendars for the rest of our lives to make room for whatever He wants to do!

        
    Are you treating Him as the amazing, merciful, and compassionate God that He is or has He become that annoying kid next door in your life?

Whoever has My commands and keeps them is the one who loves Me. The one who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them.” – John 14:21

(Beautiful picture courtesy of my friend, Jessica Sepúlveda.  Thanks, Jess!)

More Than Meets the Eye

She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her:  "You are the God who sees me," for she said, "I have now seen the One who sees me."  ~ Genesis 16:13

Have you ever felt unappreciated?  Like no one really cared how you were doing as long as you got your work done or did what they needed from you?  As I was reading the story of Abram, Sarai, and Hagar in Genesis 16, I was struck by how much we often have in common with Hagar.  I had never really paid that much attention to her before and, turns out, that was the point.  You see, Hagar was a servant in Abram's house.  In this passage she was given by her mistress to her master to be his wife.  It says nothing about Hagar choosing this or even being excited at the idea.  She had no choice in the matter. 

Hagar, throughout her life, up to the point of her encounter with God, was seen first as someone who could run errands and get things done, then as the carrier of the heir to Abram's house.  In either case it was not her that was seen, but what she could accomplish.  I would imagine she began to feel invisible, unseen, forgotten.  It says Sarai began to treat her so harshly that Hagar ran away. 

It was at this point when Hagar found herself alone in the desert that an angel of the Lord came to her.  He says:

Hagar, servant of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going? ~ Genesis 16:8a

Notice that the angel uses her name.  Earlier in verses 2 and 3, Sarai only calls her "maidservant."  She doesn't use her name.  But this angel of the Lord comes, calls her by name, and asks about her, not the task she's supposed to be working on or the child she carries.  He was interested in her.  I would imagine that is something Hagar had never experienced before, or at least not very often.  She had gotten used to being invisible, but God said she was more than that.  She desired to be noticed and God came down to tell her she was not forgotten. 

Your Father has not forgotten you.  He sees you.  He knows what you face.  He knows you feel invisible sometimes, but He wants you to know that He sees you, He loves you, and He wants the very best for you.

This story portrays a lot of Sarai's less desirable qualities of wanting to be in control, but I believe Sarai was just as broken as Hagar.  Here she was, the wife of a prominent man of God and she couldn't provide the one thing her society said a wife should – an heir.  The first time she is mentioned in scripture her barrenness is made known:

Now Sarai was barren; she had no children.  ~ Genesis 11:30

I believe she must have felt unworthy, humiliated, like a failure.  I would imagine she saw herself as "less than" because she couldn't complete the one thing she was called to do.  But our God is an awesome God and He saw Sarai just as He saw Hagar and just He sees us. 

God also said to Abraham, "As for Sarai your wife, you are no longer to call her Sarai; her name will be Sarah.  ~ Genesis 17:15

Literally translated, Sarah means princess.  She saw herself as a failure, but god saw her as His princess.  He saw nations coming from her when she began to doubt her ability to provide just one child.  God sees more in you than you can ever see in yourself.  Men, think of Gideon (mighty man of God while hiding in a winepress), Peter (a fisherman who later was a great apostle), Paul (a persecutor of the Church who later penned most of the New Testament). 

There is more in you than what you see in the mirror.  Our Father sees you and loves you as His dear child.  Never believe that you are forgotten, because your Father in heaven sees you and calls you His own.

Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care.  And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.  So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. ~ Matthew 10:29-31