Encourage One Another

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. - 1 Thessalonians 5:11

Over the past couple of weeks I have seen so many posts, articles, comments, etc. of moms very aggressively sharing their views on mothering.  While sharing these opinions in and of themselves is not wrong, the manner in which I have seen it is. I read verses like the one above and weep a little.  We are called to encourage one another and build each other up . . . but is that "just as in fact [we] are doing?"  When I read a post, especially one between Christian mothers, that leaves my stomach turning, not because of the advice or opinions, but because of the tone, words, and anger behind them, it hurts my heart.  I'm not the first to say all of this and I'm sure I won't be the last.  Being a mom is hard work!  We have so much to decide on - sleeping, eating, playtime, outdoor playing, screen time, music, education, even diapers for goodness sakes!  And each one of us will make those decisions.  We'll have opinions of why our choice is best and maybe are so convinced at how great our decision was that we want to share it with others.  No matter what decision we make, one thing is the same.  We want the best for our child.  We want them to feel loved, to succeed, to know the Lord, to see His work in our lives, to be healthy, to be encouraged . . . and the list goes on.

I don't know the perfect answer to all of these decisions for every mama in the world, but what I do know is this.  God gave me my son.  And He gave me to him.  I know him better than any other person on this planet.  I know my family better than any other person on this planet.  And God trusted me with them.  He gave me the ability to think and make decisions.  He taught me to trust Him and turn to Him when those decisions are hard.  He taught me to listen to Him and stand firm in obedience even when it didn't make sense to others (or even myself).  How God has led me to raise my children may not be the same as He led you, but know that it doesn't change my opinion of you and it will not change my support of you.  

Being a mama is hard, but you are doing a great job!  How do I know?  Because if you are following the Lord and calling on Him to help raise your child, you are making the best decisions (even the hard ones) and are leaning on the best Father there ever was or will be to give you wisdom.  He knows you and your child intimately, after all He formed your child in your womb (Psalm 139)!  He has plans for you and your child and His plans are good and are never thwarted (Jeremiah 29:11, Job 42:2).

My purpose in this post is to encourage mamas to remember how hard it is and rather than make those decisions harder for other mamas, encourage them.  Offer advice if it's asked for, but encourage whatever decision they make.  If you think they've made the wrong decision, pray that the Lord would lead them to a different decision, but ultimately trust that God will lead them in what is best for their child.  

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. - Hebrews 10:24-25

When The Storm Comes

Some days or seasons it feels as though the clouds have parted and the very light from heaven is beaming down on you. Everything is going great! Your relationship with God is amazing, you and your spouse are connecting on a very close, intimate level, you feel like you have your feet under you when it comes to caring for the kids, and life just couldn't get any better. It's a mountaintop season and you are loving life.

Then there are those other times. Where you know God is there, but the dark clouds have rolled in and it seems like the thunder drowns out His voice as the lightning strikes and the rain comes down so hard you have to duck your head, close your eyes, and just run for shelter. That might seem a bit dramatic, but maybe you're there right now and it is all too real. Or maybe it's somewhere in between. The last several weeks have been a stormy season for my family and I in general. My step dad was very ill over the summer (I'm talking ICU ill) and is still not out of the woods although being out of the hospital. In the last week his sister had emergency surgery for an infected finger, then his mother passed away, then...then....then.... You get the idea. It starts to feel like the rain will never end and with each bolt of lightning comes another unexpected, blinding blow. I confessed to my husband and my God the other day that I just don't know what to do. I hate seeing my loved ones suffer, but know there is little to nothing I can do to "fix" the situation. It is unreal the number of ways God has spoken encouragement to me over the last several days following this confession. I don't have a tried and true way to resolve this, but I can pass along the tidbits of encouragement He has given me and encourage you to make the same confessions if you find yourself in a similar situation. And understand, the situation itself hasn't changed, but my perspective has been adjusted. Here are just a few encouragements:

The morning after making this confession I was trying to get my 8 month old fed, changed, dressed, and happy to go to our bi-weekly Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPs) meeting.  And it was just one of those mornings.  He refused to eat, had to be changed again before we got out the door, and cried in the car seat until he finally settled down . . . and we ran into traffic.  During this time God gave me the peace of mind to pray – "Lord, do something!  I can't do all of this."  And suddenly a song came on.  I don't normally have the radio on, but Jesus knew.  It started like this – "Well forgive me, forgive me if I'm wrong, but this looks like more than I can do on my own."  Boy did that get my attention.  It was my prayer!  Here's where it ended:

I can do all things
Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don't have to be
Strong enough
Strong enough

("Strong Enough" by Matthew West)

I don't have to be strong enough.  In and of myself I'm not strong enough.  BUT God is!  I can have peace knowing He is strong enough and I can rest easy in that.

The next encouragement was very simple.  As we left that meeting I got behind a mini-van whose license plate was very simply "God Wins."  What a great reminder!  Yeah, life is tough right now, but in the end I know that God wins!

Many of the troubles my family faces right now I find hard to believe will every truly change.  They are "impossible."  Things I have grown accustomed to and, if I'm completely honest, I have lost faith will ever be different.  So here's how God got me there:

We say, "I always failed there, and I always will."  Consequently, we don't ask for what we want.  Instead, we think, "it is ridiculous to ask God to do this."  If it is an impossibility, it is the very thing for which we have to ask.  If it is not an impossible thing, it is not a real disturbance.  And God will do what is absolutely impossible.  [My Utmost for His Highest}

Did you catch that?  God works in the impossible.  Too often I get bogged down in the idea that it will never change and so give up on praying for it . . . instead of going to the only One who has the ultimate power to reach down and change the impossible.  Man was that convicting to read!  So when I feel utterly helpless and out of control as I face hard situations, what am I to do?  Go to the One who is in complete control.  Don't write off prayer as "doing nothing."

Last one, I promise.  Sometimes we face hard moments.  We pray and ask God to do something, work in the impossible and nothing happens.  The person passes away, the illness gets worse, the finances don't appear, we don't get that promotion, and the list goes on.  What then?  It's a tough question and one that many people answer by walking away from their faith.  Here's the thing.  We need to trust that God is in absolute control.  He knows our situation, sees our pain, feels our pain, and has a plan.  His plan is not always what we want to happen, but we can trust that it is good because He cannot deny Himself.  He is a good Father. 

I heard this song on the radio that tough morning and it really encouraged me (and had me crying).  As I read over the words I find myself not just enjoying it, but making it my prayer and declaration.  Perhaps you'll do the same:

Letting go of every single dream
I lay each one down at Your feet
Every moment of my wandering
Never changes what You see

I’ve tried to win this war I confess
My hands are weary I need Your rest
Mighty Warrior, King of the fight
No matter what I face, You’re by my side

When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!

Truth is, You know what tomorrow brings
There’s not a day ahead You have not seen
So, in all things be my life and breath
I want what You want Lord and nothing less

When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!

You are my strength and comfort
You are my steady hand
You are my firm foundation; the rock on which I stand

Your ways are always higher
Your plans are always good
There’s not a place where I’ll go, You’ve not already stood

When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!

I will trust in You!
I will trust in You!
I will trust in You!

["Trust in You" by Lauren Daigle]

What If It Were Me?

Remember those who are in prison, as though you were in prison with them; those who are being tortured, as though you yourselves were being tortured. - Hebrews 13:3

As I read this passage I was deeply convicted.  How many times have I heard of horrific situations people are facing, maybe even pray for them in the moment, and then a few minutes later I've continued on with my life and completely forgotten what they're going through.  This verse reminds me to remember the plights and prayers of people as if I myself were facing the situation.  I wouldn't forget to lift up a prayer for provision if I were facing financial ruin, to seek supernatural healing and peace while encountering a troubling diagnosis, or ask God to move mightily if I were lost in a state of depression, yet I so often forget to lift up similar requests for those around me who are facing these situations.  The only response I can find is to repent for my lack of focus and concern for others and ask God to open my heart and eyes to these situations around me with a renewed understanding and motivation to lift them up in prayer and support them as the Lord leads.


Lord, forgive my negligence. Give me a heart that is open and willing to be affected and broken by the plights of others.  Teach me not to be afraid to become invested that I might better serve my neighbors for Your Glory.  Amen.

Continual Renewal

Take a moment and think back on your childhood.  How you acted, what you thought about certain things, or how mature you were.  Now compare that to who you are now.  Are there any differences?  For most of us we can see how throughout our lives we have grown in knowledge, experience, understanding, maturity, and in many other areas.  In Colossians we find a call to exhibit this same growth in our spiritual lives, in our relationship with Christ Jesus:

. . .  you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. – Colossians 3:9b-10

As I read this passage what stuck out to me was that in addition to the initial new self that we put on, we are being renewed.  This implies a continuous, ongoing action.  Our relationship with Christ was not a onetime deal where we put on the new self and were in that moment at the relationship level with Christ that He wanted us to remain at for our entire lives.  Just as our parents and older siblings look forward to a child's constant growth as they learn to walk, speak, reason, etc., our Father looks forward to those milestones of constant growth in our relationship with Him as well.  Peter talks about this in terms of moving from spiritual milk to meat in our understanding of God (1 Peter 2).

So how do we do this?  How do we maintain this constant renewal?

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. – Colossians 3:12

How often do you clothe yourself?  I'm really hoping you put clothes on every day!  So when Paul says to clothe yourselves with compassion, humility, gentleness and patience, I see it as something we are to do daily.  Again, this is not something we can do one time and hope that it sticks for the rest of our lives.  Just as our clothes, should we never change them, begin to smell and grow old, our compassion, humility, gentleness, and patience would grow stale without being refreshed and renewed daily.  One way to renew these traits daily is through encouragement through God's Word and dialogue with God through prayer.  Another way comes through fellowship with other Christians:

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. – Colossians 3:16

I love this verse!  Did you notice the word pastor, preacher, or leader in this verse?  No!  Why not?  Because this is the job of the Christian community and is not to be left for our leaders alone.  It requires the participation of every member of the body of Christ to teach one another and to come together to praise God and express our mutual thankfulness to Him for all He has done in our lives.  Consider another of Paul's letters:

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. – Hebrews 10:23-24

We have the opportunity and the honor of spurring one another on in good deeds, in worship, in service, in knowledge, and, in turn, in spiritual growth as we support one another.  Through prayer, the reading of God's Word, and fellowship with other believers who are encouraging and supporting one another as the body of Christ, we find ourselves being continually renewed in the image of our Creator.  Lest we grow sidetracked in our own growth and become proud in what we have accomplished, Paul reminds us to constantly point to the Lord as the One who makes possible this growth and all we do:

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. – Colossians 3:17

Remember

Immediately the rooster crowed the second time. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken to him: "Before the rooster crows twice you will disown me three times." And he broke down and wept. – Mark 14:72

Has God ever spoken something to you and then the next day, next week, next year you've completely forgotten about it?  Then something comes up and suddenly you remember everything He said?  I can recall doing that with a calling God made clear to me my freshman year of college.  At that time I felt God was calling me to the mission field, but I also felt certain that I was to finish school first.  I quickly got caught up in classes, majors, and future plans to the point that I forgot this calling.  It wasn't until I was accepted into Regent University's School of Divinity with a full scholarship that I suddenly remembered several years before when God told me I would be doing this.

For a while I wondered how I could forget something that significant for my life.  I found some comfort in the fact that I certainly was not the first to encounter this forgetfulness.  In Mark 14 we find the story of the last Passover Jesus celebrated with His disciples before His crucifixion.  At one point Jesus tells His disciples that all of them will fall away from Him.  It says:

Peter declared, "Even if all fall away, I will not." "I tell you the truth," Jesus answered, "today—yes, tonight—before the rooster crows twice you yourself will disown Me three times." – Mark 14:30-31

That very night Peter denied Christ three times just as Jesus said he would (Mark 14:72).  We might look at this passage and wonder how in the world Peter could have forgotten the words of Christ within the same day they were spoken!  But we must consider this in comparison to our own lives.  Peter had a lot going on.  His friend and Messiah had been arrested, those at the trial were obviously hostile towards Jesus and, in turn, His followers, and Peter was caught in the midst of all of it.  He proceeded without thought as to what Jesus had said.  He was so caught up in the situation and the speed with which life was happening in that moment that he acted without remembering first.

Was that the end of Peter?  Was he from then on forgotten, denied, and rejected because He forgot the words of his Lord?  No!  Emphatically no!  The book of Acts is riddled with the actions and words of Peter.  In Galatians 2:8 he is called an apostle to the Jews.  And let us not forget that he is credited with writing two books of the New Testament!  God recognizes that we are a forgetful people.  Consider this:  the word "remember" is used 166 times in the New International Version.  God is constantly telling His people to remember and even showing them ways in which they can remember:

Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth. – Genesis 9:16

Remember this, fix it in mind, take it to heart, you rebels.  Remember the former things, those of long ago; I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like me.  – Isaiah 46:8-9

Perhaps you forgot something God commanded you to do, or not do.  Maybe it was a promise God made to you.  It could even be something God did in your life that you had forgotten about.  Take a moment to ask God to remind you of His word to you.  He is faithful to answer.  And never feel that you are somehow unworthy or rejected because you forgot what the Lord spoke to you.  Again, He is a faithful God, He created you, He loves you, and He still wants the absolute best for you.

But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. – John 14:26

Peace, Quiet, and God

Recently I was going through a time where I was really stressed.  It seemed like everything was coming due at the same time and I had to work nonstop to even begin completing everything on my "to do" list.  I was getting so frustrated and almost depressed because there was so much to do and so little time.  All I really wanted to do was crawl under my covers and sleep, take a walk, read a book, watch a movie, anything other than those things I "had" to do.  It was during this time that God started to speak to me about something I had often heard of, but had never truly followed . . . Sabbath.

Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it He rested from all the work of creating that He had done.  ~ Genesis 2:3

God is the all-powerful creator of the universe.  Do you think He really needed to take a break?  I believe God used this as an example for us.  We are not meant to work non-stop.  We need breaks.  Throughout the Old Testament, and into the New Testament, we see the importance of the Sabbath day.  It was a time for the people of God to rest in His Presence without working.  I love how Deitrich Bonhoeffer discussed the Sabbath.  He wrote there is "no commandment to work, but there is a commandment to rest from work . . . God knows that the work we do can gain so much power over us we can no longer leave it alone . . . It is not work that supports us, but God alone . . . The Sabbath rest is the visible sign that human beings live by the grace of God and not by works . . . "

Perhaps you're like me, a workaholic.  I can't seem to stop working.  If there is something to be done I'll keep working until it's completed.  The problem is there is always something to be done!  As Bonhoeffer wrote, work had power over me and I could not leave it alone.  It was at this time that God really began encouraging me to take a weekly Sabbath. 

So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak.  When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob's hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man.  Then the man said, "Let me go, for it is daybreak."  But Jacob replied, "I will not let you go unless you bless me."  The man asked him, "What is your name?"  "Jacob," he answered.  Then the man said, "Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome." ~ Genesis 32:24-28

After [Jesus] had dismissed them, He went up on a mountainside by Himself to pray.  Later that night, He was there alone.  ~ Matthew 14:23

Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where He prayed.  ~ Mark 1:35

Do you notice a trend?  In each instance, and there are plenty more, we see the person by themselves and the passing of time.  In determining how God wanted me to spend my Sabbath He reminded me of two very important things. 

First, Sabbath isn't simply not working, it is actively taking time to spend with the Lord.  This is time that is set aside to spend with God.  Often we hear Sabbath in regard to not working, but it is so much more than that.  Yes, you aren't working, but that time is not replaced with just any leisure activity you choose.  This time needs to be spent with God.  In taking time to worship Your God He will refresh you and prepare you for the week to come. 

Second, Sabbath isn't to be rushed.  Not that I have already obtained this (Phil 3:13), but let me share what I've been doing as part of my observance of the Sabbath.  I live fairly near a state park so on Saturday afternoon I take my Bible and go for a walk.  I walk a pretty long distance, but here's the key – I don't wear a watch, my phone is on silent, I don't take people with me.  I've gotten into calling these my God walks.  It's a time where I can come before God without the distractions of my normal day.  There are no time limits or deadlines set on me, no amount of Scripture that I have to read before I say it's done.  No two walks are ever the same.  Each time God has something new to speak to me about.  And when I get away from the noise of my life and focus solely on Him it's amazing how much clearer His voice is, how the normal, everyday stresses seem so much smaller, and how He prepares me for the week by filling me anew with strength, courage, and peace.  As with Jacob in Genesis 32, I have come to find that when we take time with God and give Him our focus He will speak to you and bless that time you have given Him.  Never think of it as a waste of time that you could be doing other work.  When you give to the Lord I firmly believe that He blesses your offering if it is given with a sincere heart.  So many times I have taken time with God when I really didn't have it to give and suddenly my work went so much faster and I was much more efficient that I had been before.

It's not always easy, but I encourage you to pray about taking a Sabbath.  Take some time to just spend with God.  Get away from the distractions and listen to Him.  We all need time of peace, quiet, and God.

Bear in mind that the Lord has given you the Sabbath . . . ~ Exodus 16:29a

Praying with Giants

 This day the Lord will hand you over to me, and I’ll strike you down and cut off your head.  Today I will give carcasses of the Philistine army to the birds of the air and the beasts of the earth, and the whole world will know that there is a God in Israel.  ~ I Samuel 17:46

As I mentioned in my last post, I got the opportunity to go to New York City in October and work with the New York School of Urban Ministry.  Once again I wanted to share with you a story of something that occurred on our trip that touched my heart. 

A couple days into our trip we got to lead a service at the Bowery Mission.   I could go on and on about this night, but for time’s sake I’ll just tell you one story.  One of the guys from our group gave an awesome message about David and Goliath.  He shared that we all have a Goliath in our life – something that seems too big for us to conquer on our own.  It could be an addiction, financial, a relationship, or many other things.  He proceeded to tell this room filled with homeless individuals that each person there was a champion.  It was incredible to imagine what the people there had faced and what they must be thinking when they were told they were champions.  This man from our group when on to share that  when David stepped up in faith to fight Goliath it says that he told Goliath, “The Lord will hand you over to me!”  He pointed out that it was God who delivered Goliath to David as soon as David stepped out in faith and the victory was not dependent on David’s strength.  At the altar call he invited anyone up to receive prayer and support for the giant in their life. 

Although I wasn’t assigned to do altar mission, I happened to notice one more person come forward than people we had serving.  After a split second of considering it, I stepped forward to pray with this man.  I want you to get an image in your mind of what this looked like.  I’m just over five feet tall and this gentleman was well over six feet.  On my tip toes I didn’t even reach his shoulders!  I came forward, took his hands, and asked what he would like me to pray for.  He proceeded to tell me that he had been a heroine addict for over twenty-two years and he knew he needed to stop.  Standing on my tip toes so he might be able to hear me, God allowed me to pray for this man.  As I shared with my team afterwards, I can’t even tell you what I said.  Words just started flowing from my mouth so that I could just sit back and listen to what was going on.  It was such an amazing experience.  During this time one of the professors that came with us stepped forward and put his hand on my shoulder to pray for me as I was praying for this man.  As I told him later, not only was he offering me spiritual support, but his hand was also holding me steady as I stood on tip toes to pray!  It may seem like a minor detail, but it showed me that God was even working in the little details.

I want to conclude my show and tell time with the reminder that I did not do any of this on my own.  God provided every part of this trip from the finances to the organizations we served with to the encounters I had with people.  He gave me the strength and courage to do all that He asked of me.  When you step forward in faith, obeying the Lord, He will provide all you need.

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.  Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.  ~ Isaiah 40:31